Day 4

And the saga continues...
Day 4

It was another great day in beautiful Addis Ababa. The gang wanted to go shopping again, so we did. We discovered this really neat charity they have here while we were in town. It is called “Hope Enterprises”. They sell tickets to tourists that are good for meals. So instead of handing out money you can just hand out a ticket that will get the bearer a square meal. 8 tickets cost just 4 Birr or about 50 cents. We bought a ton and handed them out all day.

Greyson is doing really well. He still is not attached to us in a way we would like but seems to be doing pretty well. The nannies here are so great that he is really attached to them, which is to be expected. He seems very smart and curious. But as we would find out soon, we didn’t know the half of Greyson’s story.

Mulat, a staff member came to Heather and I and told us that there was a potential problem with our birth mother visit. Apparently her mother, Greyson’s grandmother, had been sick and Greyson’s mom came to Addis Ababa to be with her own mother but no one knew how to get in touch with her. Heather and I were distraught. We had been thinking and praying about that meeting for so long that we were really bummed that it may not happen. Dr. Tsegaye promised that they were doing their best to find her but that it may not be possible. Heather and I decided we would still travel to his town because we were hoping to meet his birth family and see where he was born even if the birth mother was not going to be there.

After lunch, the group decided to go to another museum. Heather and were not up for it so we reluctantly decided to stay back. As we were having a follow up conversation with Dr. Tsegaye, he once again reassured us that they were doing everything they could. As we turned to go back into the house his phone rang. We didn’t think anything of it until he said, “Heather……good news. She is here.”
We responded, “You mean here in the city?” and he answered, “no outside of the compound…..at the gate.” 30 seconds later she was walking straight towards us.

We were not quite sure how to react. This is the type of thing that you would like to be gathered for in advance but there was no time for that. Here she was. She is very young, only 22. She was attractive and very friendly. She explained that her mother was here in Addis Ababa because of a stomach condition and probably requires surgery.

So there we sat in the middle of the dining room ready to have our powwow. Heather began the meeting by attempting to read the letter she had written several days before. That lasted about a paragraph before Heather, and Tsege (mother) began crying. That is when I took over reading the letter. That was a much better plan. They both settled down a bit and we got through the letter. As I mentioned in my previous post, it was a very touching letter that Heather had written and it hit the mark.

We then gave her a chance to ask us questions. All she wanted to know was if we could bring him back in 4 to 6 years for a visit. We assured her that we would love to do that at some point in time but were unsure as to when it might be. Then it came to our questions. There were a few basics…..turns out there is asthma in Greyson’s family, no big deal. No other family medical history so that was good news. His father was a carpenter. Then we asked how his father died. This you will not believe.

One day, while in an area next to his region, a rival tribe came around. They did not like the fact that there were other tribal people in their region from another tribe. In fact, they disliked it very much. They killed 300 people that day and Greyson’s father was one of them. We do not know how they did the killing but we can only assume it was gun fire because they killed them all quickly and buried them in a mass grave. It was a tragic end for Greyson’s father and one that is too often repeated in Africa. Greyson was born 5 months after his father’s death. His mother, sensing that God’s hand must have somehow been in everything decided to name him “Yabsira”, meaning “work of God”. Heather and I sat, speechless for a few moments.

Then Dr. Tsegaye, the orphanage director and a huge saint of a man, told us that Greyson’s mom would be traveling with us to Awassa and return with us the next day to Addis Ababa. Unbelievable. Most families get, at most, an hour to spend with the birth parent(s); we were going to get 24. This was a real answer to prayer. For those of you who know Heather well, this was her biggest concern…..meeting Greyson’s mom. Every time we think God has outdone himself, he just keeps showing off.

As our meeting wrapped up, we agreed to let her spend several hours alone with Greyson in the compound, as it would more than likely be the very last time she would see him, at least for a very long time. We also gave her a photo album that contained various pictures of family members, our home, our church and the school Greyson will most likely attend. As she looked at a picture of Maddie standing on our deck, she commented what a beautiful school she attended. We had to explain that the picture was taken at our home not Maddie’s school. Just another realization of how blessed we are. We left some blank pages for the pictures we promised to send regularly.

Heather and I wrapped up our day by having dinner at the Hilton and a glass of wine afterwards. It was a relaxing night after what turned out to be a very emotionally draining but beautiful day.

Day 3

Here is day three of our journey for those who are keeping track.

Day 3

Today we shop! That was our goal as we got up and got going today. Plus, we wanted to see one of the museums they have here. It was supposed to be our birth family visit day but since that was rescheduled we had some time bargains and culture.

But before we got out there to find some African treasures… first things first! We spent a lot of good quality time with Greyson. For those of you wondering why the updates have been light on Greyson details it is because we have slowly been spending more and more time with him each day. They tell you that it is very important not to overwhelm with too much alone time but to slowly build up time until you leave. He is a really cool little guy. He has a serious side and is incredibly tenacious. He is also in to everything!

He seems very healthy with the exception on a rattling cough, which is pretty common here at the orphanage. He loves it when you tickle him and that is usually when he laughs the most. I was surprised to hear the head nanny tell me that she thinks he looks like me. It must be the round pumpkin head or something. Did we mention he has a voracious appetite? This kid can down Cheerios and bananas like no one’s business. His motor skills seem great. He is crawling and cruising around while standing. He can’t walk alone yet but it won’t be long. He still prefers the nannies to Heather and I but has never been upset about us taking him or playing with him. We took him back to our room for the first time last night and he was a bit freaked out by that. Overall, we are having one of the better bonding experiences compared to some other families.

So……we hired a driver for a half a day. Yonas is his name and he is the driver the orphanage uses. He is awesome. He drove us to the market where you bargain and he stayed with us the entire time. He would hold our bags and just made us feel safe. It was much like shopping at the markets in Mexico…..lots of people asking you if you wanted this or that. They really wanted to show us their tablecloths, not sure why but they seemed to be especially proud of them. After only a few stops he suggested we go to the fixed price store. Once we arrived I realized why he had suggested we switch….. I was not negotiating very well. I was overpaying at the place that was supposed to be less expensive.

The museum was next. The museum our driver suggested is at the Addis Ababa University. It was really cool because in addition to having some really cool stuff, it was the former palace of Ethiopian dictators. The last dictator was killed in 1966 in a revolution. You know how they bumped him off? They suffocated him with a pillow. Not exactly the violent revolt you normally picture. Anyway, it was an interesting experience. There is a lot of security getting into the university. Bombings have not been uncommon in the city in the last year. Eritrean based Al Qaeda groups have been trying to solve border disputes by bombing various Addis Ababa targets. So…. needless to say the security is tight everywhere.

The grounds of the university were really beautiful. About 10,000 students go to school there. They have just about every academic course of study we have here…. engineering, medicine, business and so on.

Our driver, Yonas, showed us much of the city…..the parliament building, the Prime Minister’s palace and the like. What struck us was the amount of poverty. We expected it but every day you are exposed to it, the reality of the people’s situation just weighs on you. As we went through different parts of the city we saw people in misery that is hard to imagine from an American perspective. Many people had injury induced deformities that caused them to walk in unnatural ways. Some were just malnourished and others were lacking for clothes. It was also easy to tell the people with later stages of HIV/AIDS. They had the typical sunken cheeks and empty eyes that you see on TV. Many people see Americans and beg……which is not hard to imagine. We hand out small bills where we can but you have to be careful. It is very easy to cause a mob scene here by passing out money or food. If you give something to someone, it can lead to a fight over whatever you gave or cause a crowd to gather around you. You just have to be thoughtful of the environment and be cautious when handing stuff out.

Yonas delivered us back to the orphanage safe and sound in his 1984 Toyota Corolla that had 266,000 miles on it. I asked him how much I owed him thinking that $50US would be a bargain. After all he spent 3 hours with us and drove us all over Addis Ababa. He charged me 160 Birr, or $16US. I couldn’t believe it. I, obviously, gave him more than that. For those of you curious about gas prices here, it is 7 Birr per liter, or about $4US per gallon.

This afternoon as we were spending time with Greyson, a couple came to see their child they had left at the orphanage a few days prior. They had returned to the city to sign the final documentation which relinquishes custody of the child…….Permanently. It was an uncomfortable scene to watch as they spent final minutes with the toddler they had given up. They were not overly emotional…you could tell they were trying to be strong. But there is no hiding a mother’s pain. As she looked at Polaroid’s the staff had just taken for them to take as keepsakes, you could tell she was in deep pain; pain that I am sure is reserved only for mothers losing a child. As she thumbed through the pictures, slowly, one at a time, it is like she lost all touch with the environment around her. She was completely focused or maybe even lost in the pictures that would be her only reminder of the child she could not keep as her own.

So, later that night we had dinner with the other families here at the orphanage. the food was, once again, amazing. After dinner, Heather and I learned a very valuable lesson. You want to know what it was? OK……….

NEVER…and I mean NEVER watch a movie about an African dictator while in Africa!

Heather and I had brought the movie The Last King of Scotland, a movie about the brutal reign of Idi Amin of Uganda. It really freaked us out. It was a great movie and if you have seen it, you know why Forrest Whitaker won an Oscar for his role as Amin.

OK, so that was our day. We hope all of you are doing well. We really appreciate getting your emails because they make us feel closer to home! The internet is amazing. Plus, we really want to tell everyone that we physically feel the power of your prayers. In a part of the country where we feel vulnerable, God has provided much comfort due to your prayers. God is truly amazing.

Day Two of our trip

Here is Day two of our trip back in may




Day 2 – Embassy Day

We woke up at 6:00 AM local time. We had to wake up because that is when the Muslim prayers are said over a loud speaker that is loud enough to be heard in England. Seriously, this is broadcast over speakers like we use at home for tornado sirens. Plus, this guy was on fire…..he went on for freakin’ ever. I couldn’t quite make out what he was saying since, like most Imams, this one was not praying in English. This was the icing on the cake since it became apparent last night that roosters here crow even when it is dark and the neighborhood dogs enjoy barking only after 2AM.

Heather and I got dressed and went in for breakfast. The dining room is a neat room with two, huge framed pictures of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt (they used this agency too). I asked if they would like a glamour shot of Heather but they didn’t really know what a glamour shot was. We were not quite sure what to expect for breakfast. It turned out to be great… French toast that was a little heavy on cinnamon but good none the less. The coffee here is absolutely awesome. This is the birth place of coffee so I guess it should be pretty good. Plus the people who work here are simply the best. They are more than accommodating and try to do the very best they can with what they have.

Oh, I forgot to mention the bathroom developed a very strong mold and mildew smell over night. We are having a really hard time with the bathroom. It is just really gross. Heather compared it to an epidural…..you think you can tough it out but when reality sets in, the pain is just too much! But we are managing. Also, I forgot to mention before that the toilet seats here are square. I am not really sure why but I can tell you this…..they are no more comfortable than the sandpaper Ethiopians call toilet paper.

OK, after breakfast we walked a block to the older children’s orphanage. Wow, what a great experience. The nannies here are just amazing. You can tell that they really love these kids. They are constantly picking them up or wiping runny noses. By the way, nose run like a raging river with these kids. I think it is just really easy for them to get little bugs. Anyway, in the older kid orphanage, there are about 50 kids varying in age form 1 and a half to 6 years old. They get so excited when you come to see them. They are like a mob, craving attention and hoping beyond hope that you are the one that has come to take them out of this place. Most of them seem happy enough given their circumstances. It is hard to miss the ones who are deeply saddened by their lot, though. There was one little girl that had just come to the orphanage a week prior to our visit. She is about 2, maybe 2 and a half. I am not sure that I have ever witnessed as much sadness on another human being’s face as I was able to see in hers. She was not interested in the hard candy the rest of the kids were fighting over. She just sat there in the middle of the room with a blank look on her face as if she still believed that this was temporary… that surely someone would be back to get her soon. Heather did her best to get her to laugh but was only successful in getting one faint smile out of her. I am not sure I will ever forget this little girl. I know it sounds cheesy to say something will haunt you but this might do it for me.

These are the lucky kids. We have already seen tons of kids who have very little. The orphanage is surrounded by tin shacks where people make their homes. They have rocks on top of the tin roofs to keep them from blowing off and they sit by side with only a wall separating them from each other. The walls are tin, paper or mud. These ghettos go on for blocks and blocks.

We spent some time with Greyson this morning, which was great. He played outside in a walker and was cruising around like he owned the joint. He is a very serious character. Not mad or sad just serious. He has a great disposition and is a joy to be around.

Lunch was wonderful, a good mix of Italian food and vegetables. I had seconds but not that surprises any of you!

Next came our Embassy visit. This is where all of the adopting families load up their new kids at the same time and cart them off to U.S. embassy workers to explain why you want to adopt them and obtain an entry visa for the child. Let me just start by saying that there was only two small vans for 8 families, seriously. There are no safety seats and no seat belts so you just kind of do it on faith. Greyson wasn’t sure about the whole ordeal and became a little fussy…..nothing a few hundred Cheerios couldn’t fix, though. Upon our arrival at the embassy, I have to admit I was a bit disappointed. It is not that expected a 30 foot bronze statue of the President or anything but I at least thought it would have a big American flag and a sign or something. There was nothing. You could have driven by and never known that the embassy was there. I think maybe they do that on purpose. No use putting a big poster of Bush out there to act as a target. Upon entering they did have a big picture of W flanked on either side by Cheney and Condi.

The appointment was uneventful and we left the official parents of Greyson. It was sort of an anti-climatic ending to a 14 month process but we were just glad it was done! God really came through for us.

Sorry none of you are able to see pictures. Our blog isn’t working here and the only internet they have is dial up. The pictures just take up too much space for us to send. We will get out a slide show upon our return.

Tonight we closed the day with dinner at a traditional Ethiopian restaurant where they had dancers performing the dances of some of the 85 different tribes found in Ethiopia. It was very cool. The food was unbelievable. It doesn’t look very appealing but it tastes great! It was pretty spicy, which Heather loved. The Ethiopian beer isn’t bad either. It is kind of a mix between a Pale Ale and a Wheat Beer.

In closing, we just want to let everyone know that they have moved our family visit to Thursday so we won’t be doing that on Tuesday as we first thought. A few families have already had their trips to meet the birth families and they said it was awesome. We are praying that our experience will be similar. Each adopting family is supposed to write a note that they read aloud to the family through an interpreter. Heather wrote ours and I have to tell you it is great. I hope Greyson’s mom is moved as much as I was when I read it.

All is well. The only problem we have had and are having is that we miss the girls so much it has brought us both to tears at times. We know they are having a blast and are in great hands but we just miss their sweet faces.

Okay I'm a Little Late

I am gonna start posting all our journal entries from our amazing journey to Africa-

Our family is great and God has been amazing to us- I have to pinch myself because sometimes I cannot believe how blessed I am.

Day 1

It began to hit me when we hit the departure gate at Dulles……. this isn’t Kansas anymore. The travelers waiting at this gate weren’t exactly like travelers I had seen many times before in my previous journeys, you know the ones where I launched KFC Snacker or Famous Bowls. These people were almost exclusively Ethiopians… on their way home or on their way to visit family. Some were dressed in traditional clothing while others were dressed in typical American casual. It hit me, that for the next 9 days… Heather and I would be the minority, a weird realization but not one that was particularly threatening just well, foreign to someone born in Pecos, Texas.

As we walked down the jet way to board our Ethiopian airliner I was relieved to see that no one was carrying crates filled with chickens or leading small farm animals by tattered make-shift leashes made of grass rope. These were the images we feared when we booked our flight on Ethiopian Airlines…...typical, I know. As we boarded, we could instantly tell that the jet was very new….. Thank goodness no chickens or goats. We headed to our assigned seats to find an older couple sitting in our seats. I am sure the woman could tell by the puzzled looks on our faces that she and her husband were in our seats. Speaking no English, she just smiled and waved us towards their assigned seats as if to say, “Just sit over there and let us have these.” Now, that would normally not be a problem except our assigned seats were completely rockin’ compared to their assigned seats. A moral dilemma for a couple on a trip to explore the possibilities of mission work later in life! So immediately, the thought that went through my mind is we should probably let them have our seats. After all, we are on our way to act as ambassadors, right? Fortunately, I guess we waited just the right amount of time with that confused American smile on our faces, (which must have conveyed that we were trying to be nice but……no way in hell are you getting our rockin’ seats!), because they just got up and went to their seats. That was good because had it come to a conversation, Heather and I would have been forced to give them our seats and that would have made the 15-hour journey really suck!

So we flew over the Atlantic, just south of England and right over France to land for fuel in Rome. We couldn’t see anything cool in Rome when we landed; I guess the airport is far from any cool buildings. Plus, I was wiped out and half asleep. In fact, I woke to a very loud Italian man standing right in front of our bulkhead, rockin’ seats, holding a dust pan and small broom. Did I mention he was loud? Next we took off towards Africa, right over Libya and into Egyptian airspace. The desert looks very strange from 35,000 feet. You look out the window and there is just a big brown/orange cloud of sand below you.

We then flew over Sudan. In fact, as I write this paragraph, we are smack dab over Khartoum, which is a little scary. Bad things are going on down there, very bad things. There are border clashes between Ethiopia and several of her neighbors including, Sudan, Somalia and Eritrea. These countries are having disputes within their own borders and with Ethiopia. Just last week, several Europeans were released after being kidnapped in a disputed border area. This is a little nerve wracking because on Tuesday (late Monday in the states) we will be traveling 5 hours towards Somalia to meet the birth family of our new son. Kind of a weird thought for a Bush-loving republican from Texas! What an adventure!

By the way, I could never be an astronaut. How do they pee? It is hard enough after being airborne for 10 hours to do so….I can’t imagine what it is like in zero gravity. Fortunately, neither of us has struggled with motion sickness……..maybe because we over-dosed on Dramamine. Man, that stuff should be controlled by the FDA. Two of those and its lights out! Maybe that is what makes it hard to pee.

I don’t know how Moses made it through the desert, well I do; God. But we are on our 2nd hour of nothing but desert below. Except for Khartoum……No roads, no water…..no nothing just sand and more Sudanese sand. Sudan….there’s a place you don’t want to visit. The only things going on there are war, poverty and suffering. The statistics are bad enough in the “stable” African countries like Ethiopia and Kenya. In those countries, 1 in 10 children die before the age of 1. The life expectancy for a man born in Ethiopia today is 48. Tens of thousands of children under 10 years old live, alone in the streets, in the boxes they call home. There is no one to care for them or love them…. they just exist. When I transplant Maddie or Lilly’s face onto their circumstances it is almost more than I can bear. I couldn’t imagine them living like that. If ever there were a place in need of saving grace it is Africa. The good news is that almost every church in America is responding in bigger and better ways than before. In our own home town of Louisville, churches as big as Southeast and as small as our own Adventure Christian Church are adding more and more mission’s projects and dollars to their programs. This is the church’s responsibility….. to feed the body and soul, everywhere. Amen!

Arriving in Addis Ababa was a welcome event. Coming in for our landing gave us a great bird’s eye view of the city. It is a weird mixture of big buildings and tarp covered shacks. It is a city of about 5 million people. We got off the plane and waited in line for our customs clearance. We quickly learned that things move at a slightly slower pace in Ethiopia. 30 minutes later we were through customs and immigration.

We loaded our belongings into a small van and our driver, Mulat, took off in the direction of the orphanage. The city televises big soccer matches from throughout Europe and Africa on a huge (and I mean huge) TV screen in one of the city squares. A match between Manchester United and Chelsea had just finished and the must have been at least 100,000 in the streets as we tried to make our way to the orphanage. It was so surreal that here, as many people will go see a European soccer match on a big screen as will see a football game live at home.

The drive was interesting, to say the least. I have driven in multiple cities in Mexico. I would never…. and I mean never drive here. It is truly unbelievable. There are 10-12 lane blvd’s that really don’t seem to have a middle line. Drivers here use a mixture of intimidation and sharp reflexes to avoid a stand still or a wreck. Funny though, there were no wrecks that I saw.

Arriving at the orphanage was a little spookier than we thought. We turned down this VERY dark alley off a main road and went for about a half mile. At about the mid point the driver honked his horn twice. A guard stepped through a huge steel door and stood there waiting……….for a sign you see. He was waiting for a signal that this was really a van for the orphanage. Our driver flashed his lights twice and in we went. Our driver unloaded our bags and showed us our room. I will discuss our room and bathroom in a bit because it is a whole story in and of itself. But first let me tell you about our fist meeting with Greyson. We went to the little nursery where they keep him. It was meager to say the least. The room had six miniature cribs in it and was no larger than six feet by 10 feet. The walls were concrete and the door just opened to the courtyard of the small orphanage complex. There were no fans or windows and it was a little hot in there. He was great though! He warmed to us quickly and seemed to have a good sense of humor. He is a bit smaller than we imagined but seems very healthy. Heather got him to start laughing and smiling about half way through our initial visit. It was a very cool time.

OK, as I finish this day’s events I just want to tell you about our room and bathroom at the orphanage guest house. We do have a king size mattress and that is good. The floor is indoor/outdoor carpet……you know, that green stuff that look like what would go on a pool table. There is no air-conditioning and no fans which is not too bad because the temperature here is in the high 60’s at night and high 70’s in the day time (the city is 8000 feet above sea level). The bed in our room has no mattress cover, just a sheet. So we decided to just sleep on top of our Velvet Elvis blanket and put the sheet over us. The god news is that our window opens up to a great view of the guard house.

The bathroom is funny. There is a small hot water heater sitting on a shelf in the shower. The electrical plug is right there too which is kind of hairy. The shower is one of those hand held jobs and the temperature is a bit hard to adjust. You have to keep your lips pursed because it is very dangerous to drink the city water. Just to be careful, I put a little toothpaste in my mouth during my first shower in case any got in my mouth! I know I am a bit paranoid but I am not fond of the idea of puking the next 7 days. The toilet has a little sprayer (like on your kitchen sink) right next to it. I guess this is the African version of a bidet. Thanks but no.

OK off to bed. It is 4PM at home and midnight here.